Catch Up

It's been a busy couple of weeks. I've been dating a man - which hasn't really worked out. I've been at the Logan Art Gallery working my shifts and I've also been working on new work - a new painting - for the bedroom as well.

However, this week, I came down with a slight cold and so made myself a huge batch of my 'Cold Buster Soup' - which you can find on the labels 'Recipes' on the right hand side. It's a great soup to have; especially during the colder months of the year - I really count on it.

I'm also writing another book - this is a part of a bigger book on writing and collecting and life. It's all going to be hand-written and then typed up. I hope it ends up to sound as good as I'm planning it to be.

There's been plenty of rain around lately and so I haven't done anything with the back yard lately; the lawn mower hasn't been out of the shed and so the lawn has gotten long. I hope to get to it after the rain goes away. But then, isn't that what Winter is for? The rain to come and feed the plants while it's cold?

I'm also saving up again to get into the markets next year again; which means I'm also working on more over-sized pegs and other things to get it going again. It ought to be fun to get back into my routine of that again. Well, there's not much more to report... seeing I've been just catching up on everything around here. Until my next post, take care, stay safe and remember, I'm always here. 

Mother's Day

For many, Mother's Day is a day where their children and families celebrate being around them. They make them breakfast in bed, buy them presents, take them out to lunch or brunch and spend the day pampering their Mums.

Over the decades where I could have been a Mum, I have found it continuously difficult to see my years pass by and watch my other family members raise their children without feeling a pang of emptiness inside me.

Losing my two children before they were born was the hardest things I had to do. The first was a miscarriage; which wasn't my fault. The second one was an abortion, which was my decision.

Just last week, I was with Mum and told her I feel so sad not being able to have children.  It is a lonely thing to have to live with; and that having to make a decision like that when I was so young - in high school - just wasn't fair.  I knew there was a chance my Epilepsy was something I was going to pass on;and we already had another disease in the family too. So there went my chances of having anything normal.

As the years have passed and I've started my 40th year on this planet, my life plans and endeavours have taken different directions.  But I still would have love to have known what it would have been like to have children and family of my own to share it with; instead of being on my own.

Would my life have been better?

Would I have seen and experienced other things?

Would having a family have widened my world?

I can't answer those questions mainly because my world is already widened without any of those things in it; but it would be totally different had I found somebody, had I not had Epilepsy and spent a majority of my 20's struggling to stay alive while practically living in hospital emergency wards and trying out medications to control my disease.  In the meantime, my friends and family were getting married and having children over that time.

Since I've had my Epilepsy controlled in 2004, I have found getting close to anyone difficult.  Men find me too strange as a person and find my personality 'weird'... and I think it might be because I've been alone for so long and kept myself from letting people get to close.

However, now I am no longer allowed to have children, it kind of hits home more that all my friends' kids are growing up and going to school, making things for their Mum's and are just wonderful. The pang is still there in a way, however, I enjoy seeing the happiness in my family's eyes of their own kids growing up.

So, even though I don't have children - and yes, it does hurt not to have them - it doesn't mean I don't like them. It means I'm missing out on being the Mum all my friends and family have had the chance to be.  I guess I wasn't fated to be a Mum in this life.

Mother's Day

Yesterday was a huge day... so I've waited until tonight to write about it, as it's the first time I've had to sit down and do anything about writing about it.

It was a lovely, warm, sunny day; and yet we were supposed to have rain.  I had made a huge garden salad, and Mum had made a Wong Bok Salad, and we took them over to my brother's place at Brighton where we were meeting up with the rest of the family.
Traffic wasn't too bad, and we had a good run.  Gabe had the pizza oven going, hot and music playing when we arrived.  A stray chicken had made her escape from the coup and was running around the place... but we didn't worry about it, as nobody tried to catch her.  Soon after we arrived, we exchanged gifts, grabbed ourselves some drinks and the pizza making started up, along with the salads.
Around 8 pizzas were cooked up - one after the other - and they were devoured just as quickly.  The salads vanished too.  Almost two thirds were gobbled up as we all sat down and ate lunch... it was wonderful!  I'm so happy they all enjoyed my improved 'Cee Salad'... as most of the ingredients started with the letter 'C'... hehe.  
Soon after the salads were put away and everyone felt like taking a nap out on the lounge outside, coffee was made and Gabe baked some chocolate chip and macadamia nut cookies in the pizza oven!  Well!  They vanished as quickly as he put them out!  These things didn't have time to cool off as we snatched them up, still soft and hot from the oven... yummo!  the chocolate was melting and the nut chips were hot... delicious!  And did they go well with the plunger coffee!  
Before long, it was 4:30pm and it was time to take off.  We had enough coffee and food in us to tide us over for the night and the trip home.  And when I arrived at my place, I forgo making dinner as I was still full from lunch... by around 10pm, I was in bed writing in my journal and reading a book.  It had been a long day for me.
However, I had given Mum a lovely 3-pack of organic relishes.  They were in a box with the word 'Organic' scrolled across the lid and a white ribbon tied around it.  I had found it at 'The Big Apple' down the road for $12 or so and thought it would be perfect for Mum as she loves this kind of thing... and Dad would enjoy eating them too.  They were sealed properly and looked gorgeous.  Mum loved it!  I'm looking forward to knowing what they taste like. 

So, how did you spend Mother's Day?  Was it taking your Mum out to lunch or dinner?  Did you have a picnic lunch?  Or did you have a laid-back affair like we did and enjoy lunch with family at a relative's house?  Until my next post, take care, stay safe and remember, I'm always here.

Today...

Today it's Saturday - all day... and it's been a long day for me.

I woke at around 7am and didn't really go back to sleep.  I kinda just flirted with going back to sleep, when really my brain was acting like a child on Christmas Day... so I got up and going.

I had a book launch to be at and so I boiled 6 eggs while I ate breakfast.  Only 5 of them worked out... they're for a salad for tomorrow's lunch at Gabe and Kat's house.  This ought to be great!  I can't wait to be there.

But today, I was in the car, and out and about.  I had to get some money out of the bank.  I had to check the tyres on the car.  I had a few other things to do before going to Logan North Library... yep, I had to leave around 45 minutes early just to get these things done.

I got them done... and then I was off!  I was at Sanet Smit's book launch - her first! - and I loved it.  She had a gift to give away and did a reading - which got everyone to buy a copy of her book... so cool!

Then, after 2 hours, I was off again.  I went to Mum and Dad's place and found there was barely anywhere to park!  The Well-Being Centre down the road was having an Open Day - and so it was crowded around my folks' house.  We shuffled the cars around and I parked mine in the front yard where Dad and I fiddled with the left side mirror (as it still wasn't working right!).  Well, while he glued something, I kept feeling something crawling up the inside of my jeans... then I realised it was something big!

I shook my leg and jeans too ... and a massive big ant fell out onto my shoe!  It didn't stick around for long as it flew away!!! Eeewww! Ick! Ick! Ick!  Dad didn't see it... neither did Mum... but I did!  It was a huge ant!  Bigger than a Green Ant! And since Dad didn't see it, he didn't worry about it... but me?  I raced upstairs and wanted to know if it had any friends wandering around my jeans hem I didn't want to know about... and so did Mum.

Well, once we found that ant was on his own, I was okay... but I was careful about walking around on the lawn out the front.  And Dad had a careful and long look at the ants nests around the yard, saying he'd better have a better look at them all.

Not too long after this - and after figuring out how much petrol my car drinks (as it's been 2 weeks since it was bought), I decided to take off.  I had some things to do.  There was some charity stuff to drop off and some cds to buy at K-Mart.  I needed to burn some music for the car.  

And tomorrow is going to be a busy day... so tonight, I'm going to be making a very cool salad... a big one, but very cool one too. 
And speaking of tomorrow, what are you all up to?  Whatever you're doing for your Mums - here or in their memory - drive safely, take care of each other, love your Mum for now as you never know what's just around the corner that will change how you see them and how their lives will change.  Until my next post, take care, stay safe and remember, I'm always here.

It's A Friday

Yep, it's the end of the week.  A Friday... the day where everyone goes out to Happy Hour and enjoys their well-earned pay and has takeaway, catches up with mates, families and just kicks back and loves it that they have two days to themselves.

For me, Fridays are usually days where I get a lot of housework done.  I catch up with laundry, washing up, cleaning out my art area and making sure the bins are emptied around my house and put out into the big green wheelie bin in my car port.  This is so I have my two days of bliss to myself.

It's been a busy day for me.  I got two loads of laundry done and one lot of hand-washing.  It all dried - well, except the towels have a bit of damp around the edges, but it's Autumn, that happens every year.  I got a lot of washing up done and the counter looking cleaner.  Then, I put away about 20 Magna-Pegs into a plastic zip-lock bag ready to be varnished next week for the markets the week after.

Then, I hopped online and checked my mail and looked around here.  It's been a busy old week and I'm looking forward to my weekend of hanging out with my family at my brother's house this Sunday for Mother's Day.  We're having lunch there and all bringing something to eat.

I'm looking forward to going.

Anyway, I've also been trying to get some cd's burned but the new ones I bought were the wrong ones - only for pictures - and my car spat out the one I tried it out in.  So, I'll keep that lot for photos only and go back to K-Mart and get some cds to burn music onto for the car; as I don't want to stuff up my original cds.  
Tomorrow, I'll be doing that.  Also tomorrow, I'll be making a huge salad for Sunday.  I love making salads; so much I can put into it and yet it's going to be a lot of fun getting it to work out.  Which reminds me... I must boil some eggs tonight for tomorrow.  I'll be adding in some unsalted cashews, cranberries, eggs, corn, split olives, lettuce, paprika, mushrooms and other great little surprises too... and I'll spice up the mayonaise I've made with something else I've found makes it taste gorgeous.  Yummo... I can't wait until Sunday.

Well, that's been my Friday.  The weekend beckons for us all, doesn't it?  Until my next post, take care, stay safe and remember, I'm always here.

Happy Mother's Day!

Today, I'm at my parents' house, but they're on holidays; so I'm here on my own.  Mum and Dad took a few days' break to Far North Queensland... and this break went over Mother's Day.  So, this is our first time where we all will be apart on this day (I think; as I don't remember this happening before). 

Anyway, my week has been really busy before this, and so I haven't had time to write here for the last few days.  Since last Wednesday, I've been doing laundry, washing up, tidying up, finding books as I go and figuring out what to bring here to my folks' house while they're not here.  Yep, I'm house sitting again.  It's not exactly everything I want to do, but I've been able to bring along a few things before I arrived so I don't have to lug a massive suitcase with me today... at least that's something.

But today, the weather just wasn't on my side.  I had planned to be here this morning - before lunch actually - but I really was put off by the rain.  So, there I was with all my laundry done, the washing up all done, the counters all clean, the feeder in the fish tank for the fishies, and I was ready and packed... and I was stuck!  I had packed clothes and my art gear for tomorrow and some books to get my nose into for the next day or so, and some writing material too, and I looked outside to find it absolutely pouring at 10am.  So, I waited it out for 2 hours; and once there was a half hour break in the weather, I got myself packed up and ready to head out, called a cab and rushed out to the front gate, where the cab showed up within a few minutes.  And by the time we arrived here at my folks' house, clouds were coming over... now it's overcast again.  I got here just in time for the cool to settle in and the rain to arrive for tonight.

What I'm really looking forward to is getting back to my place where I have a Pumpkin, Walnut and Spinach Cannelloni waiting for me in the fridge on Tuesday or Wednesday night... yummo!  I won't have to cook anything, just bung it into the oven and heat it for 35 minutes with a bit of water.  How delicious is that?  

So, that was today's things... and last weeks'... I've also been out at the Logan Art Gallery yesterday where I was offered up a workshop to attend where it would help me turn my hobby into a business.  There were around 40 people there to listen to accountants, lawyers and other business people who told us the secrets to getting ourselves into the business world... and you know, it's not that hard.  Brian Tucker, an artist who is an accountant by trade, told us that once we want to see a bottom line and begin selling our wares to people and not give them away, that's when we become aware that our hobby is becoming a business.  It was something that struck home with me as I've never given away anything of mine that I've shown to people; I've always sold my artworks.  The first paintings I sold were bought for $15 each.  I don't know where they are now, but the people who bought them loved them.  
The lawyer, John Kenny, was great in letting us know about the legalities of Intillectual Property; who owns our works, and who commissions our works and what happens with copywright and trademarks and how to go about getting them the right ways.  He gave a very interesting speech.  However, he nearly didn't make it to the gallery as he had never been to Logan City; and I gave him directions over the phone to the place.  When he arrived he said they were very specific and he was so happy I was there talking to him through the traffic of Logan as it was very confusing to him; especially the road markings.  John also stuck around and bought something for his wife for Mother's Day as well from the Gallery Store and I gift-wrapped it for him too.  

This brings me to today.  A busy little lot of days where I've ended up somewhere else besides where I normally would be.  But life wouldn't be life without the unexpected happening, would it?  Well, until my next post, take care, keep safe and warm and remember, I'm always here.   

Mother's Day

Today, was Mother's Day.  I didn't do much, except have a nice hot shower and read the paper; taking my time with the nice cool, Autumn morning.  The wind had a brisk feel to it and I had a few things I wanted to do with my time before anything else.  I took out the rubbish and fed the pets before I did too much else.  And seeing I couldn't play any of my vinyls until my new stylus comes into the store at Woodridge, I put on some cds and turned up the volume (as the radio station I listen to has sports shows on in the mornings on the weekends; how boring can ya get???).

The first thing I did when I came into the office - before I turned on the computer - was unplug and pull down the old Epson Printer.  This thing had turned off its programming due to me not using it on a regular basis two years ago.  Since then, it's been sitting above my computer monitor gathering dust in a major way.  So, today, it was tossed into the recycle bin!  It's a huge weight off my mind; and I immediately began to sneeze!  

After cleaning down the area with a damp cloth, I moved my modem over, re-arranged my things to make it look good up there, and then got the computer going.  It was a good few hours of me stuffing around on the net before I thought to call my folks to have them around for afternoon tea.  Mum said they'd think about it; but then about an hour later, Dad called me from his car and asked if I'd like to come over to their place instead.  I said yes, and he picked me up about 20 minutes later.  We did a little shopping and showed up at their place much to the surprise of Mum; who I snuck up on!  She was thrilled I was over for the afternoon and that I had bought some snacks - very sweet ones - for us to munch on while we had coffee.

The day was windy and sunny; and yet we all had runny noses.  I think Autumn has really bothered everyone; not only us.  We were all sneezing and I felt a little as though I was coming down with a cold; but then, I always feel this way at this time of the year.  So, I'll have to find myself some antihistamines to keep my nose under control.

I showed Dad how to open a hotmail/live address on ninemsn and we had to try out about 8 or 9 addresses before it let him use one that wasn't taken. Then, we fed the birds and he worked on using that new e-mail address to its full extent.  

Once home - at around 4pm or so - I closed up the house and made sure we were nice and warm.  The television was switched on and I made myself pizza for dinner and at it all then settled in to watch 'Touch' and taped a sci-fi prophecy program on SBS (this time getting the channel on the VCR right!).  I'll watch it tomorrow; as it's on Isaac Asimov.  

So, how did you spend Mother's Day?  Did you take out your Mum and have a BBQ?  Or did you surprise your Mum with an at-home lunch with family?  Until my next post, take care, keep safe and warm and remember, I'm always here.

Mid-Week Mother's Day

Yesterday was a big day for Mum and me.  I had a doctor's appointment at the Wesley Hospital to see about what to do about an ovarian cyst.  And the wonderful gynie there put me onto the Pill... yay.  This is something I have successfully avoided for a good part of my life because I didn't think I needed it and I found it hard to find one that would agree with my meds.  So, there I was sitting in the office of the gynie talking about taking the Pill; but then realising he has probably got a lot of Epileptics on his records who are in the same boat as me.  The amazing thing about the Pill is that it won't affect my meds so much as my meds will affect how the Pill works.  Weird stuff don't you think?

After that, I asked Mum to take me around to the two places I used to live with Jason - my abusive ex-boyfriend.  This was something I needed to do as a boundary buster; something a psychologist had advised me to do during my new life without him so I can go about a normal life without remembering bad memories about the old places.  We found our ways to these two units and I took photos of them and spent time there knowing that after all this time, the area had moved on - just like I had - and even though the building looked the same, the surrounding area didn't.  Mum was as pleased as I was with how I dealt with revisiting these old places; and I'm hoping to get myself to Park Road and the last few places - like St Lucia - before too long.

Soon enough though, we were both hungry and were heading off to Mt Gravatt to have lunch.  I took Mum to Sushi Deli for a lovely lunch of sushi and some octopus fritters, green tea and I ate a delicious dessert as well.  It didn't cost as much as I thought it was going to; and so I had enough money to buy Mum her Mother's Day gift and so I did while she went off to the chemist and she loved the bell whisk and new wooden spoon I bought to replace the old ones in her kitchen (as I had noticed her old ones were in need of updating).  Earlier yesterday morning, I gave her a card with a pen attached to it and she loved the pen (as she's always looking for one in her bag) and so she added these new gifts to the ones I gave that morning.

We walked around Garden City to David Jones, where she returned something there; but I asked if it was okay for me to head off to QBD and meet her there.  She agreed and I ended up buy two books - 'Other People's Diaries' by Kathy Webb and 'The French Women Don't Get Fat Cookbook' by Mireille Guilliano.  These were on the special's table... not too bad for just under $20 if you ask me.

After she came from David Jones, we were rushing off to her hair appointment where I took in one of my books and began reading it.  I got into it a little, then became bored because a headache was bothering me.  The day had been very long and I was beginning to tire out as well.  So, my concentration levels were faltering.

By the time Mum dropped me home, it was around 4:30pm... what massive day we had had together!  It was a great day, a fun one too.  We had a lot of laughs together as well as some good chatting together about everything and anything.  I love getting together with my Mum.  And today being my day out with Mum for Mother's Day is great.  Now, my brother, Gabe, can do his thing with her on Sunday.  It's not that we don't like celebrating the day, it's just most times, we can't decide what to do together... so over the last few years, I've taken a day - a couple of days before - and he's taken her out on the day of Mother's Day.  It's worked for us over the last few years; and besides, she loves getting two special days out with her kids.  Until my next post, take care, keep safe and warm and remember, I'm always here. 

Oh So Tired... This Mother's Day

I'll start with yesterday; as it's a good place to start. I was hoping to sleep in when I heard my next door neighbours start up her laundry at 6am... all three loads of it!  Then, at 7am, her and her husband thought it was would be a bright idea to clean out their car new black Holden sedan.  So, out came the vacuum cleaner and they vacuumed the whole car from boot to front foot mats for the next hour and a half.  I got up around fifteen minutes into it seeing I wasn't going to be able to sleep in that morning!  I had to get some milk anyway; so walked by and found some friends of mine who had also been woken up by their car cleaning at this ungodly hour sitting out in their car port in their pajamas drinking a coffee and having a smoke.  They were disgusted that these neighbours had no respect for the fact that others around them were hoping to sleep in on the weekend.  It's all about them and nobody else.  However, if anyone tries to approach these noisy neighbours, the woman will say it's her house, her rules and her way or the highway (and if you don't like it?  Well, you can move out!  How do I know this little bit of info?  She told me to do just this last November when I last spoke to her face to face).

Well, the day passed and I had told Dad about the problem we had that morning.  He listened and understood where I was coming from with it all.  Then, we went out at 1pm to go to Gabe and Kat's place for the afternoon and dinner later on.  It was really cool.  While the afternoon sped by - with this coolness of Autumn here and shortened days - Mum, Kat and I patted Jay, looked at some sewing and I did some reading.  Then, Riley and Gabe arrived and Mum had just pulled a Tea Cake out of the oven and we ate most of it while it was nice and hot.  

Gabe then made hand-made Tortillas with a machine he built.  They were absolutely delicious!  And these were the first time he had made them... and won't be the last.  So, we munched into those for dinner.  Then, coffee was made afterwards and Baked Custard with stewed apples for dessert by Mum; very delicious!  By the time a few games of Rummy Cub and other talking had been done, it was around midnight and time to go home.  We got back home by 1am.

At 5:45am this morning, I was just getting into some deeper sleep when the people two doors down from me decided to hook up their boat and go fishing!  It was the noisiest operation I've ever heard (and I've stayed in caravan parks where you never hear people take off in their cars and boat trailers - empty or full - during the night or early morning)!  Then, fifteen minutes later, my next door neighbour began her laundry - again! - at 6am!  I just wanted to get some decent sleep... PLEASE!... is that too much to ask?  Can't these people just shut the hell up for one weekend to let people sleep in?  At 7am, they went out in the new car - which is louder than her white ute - and annoyed everyone trying to sleep.

By 10am, they returned, moved the cars around and then did even more laundry.  I feel like I've been half asleep the whole weekend, as I haven't had anywhere near enough sleep, and yet I can't talk to my neighbours about it... I've tried without success.

I think it's an early night for me tonight in the hope for a full night's sleep.